Popcorn Chicken

Yesterday I decided to make popcorn chicken.  I do not make it very often anymore; it is quite messy and tricky to do but it’s the meal that Roderick asked for the most.  When the kids were in elementary I would make extra and send it with them to school, I warmed it up in the morning so it wasn’t fridge cold and it was easy finger food for lunch with no sugar.

Cinnamon buns? YAY Sugar!!

One day as I walked by Roderick’s classroom and stopped to check if he was ready at the end of the day in grade six, the popcorn chicken came up. I’m not sure how it started but I think one of Roderick’s classmates made a comment about how good my popcorn chicken was, and another classmate walking by, heard it and said “Oh your popcorn chicken is the best?” in no time, I was surrounded by about five or six classmates oohing over my popcorn chicken and I looked puzzled, “how do you all know what my popcorn chicken is like?” The teacher stepped out and asked, “how come do I not know about this popcorn chicken?”

YAY Candy!

Roderick had a craving for sugar, everyone who knows him knows that, and in elementary we were trying to limit his sugar to try and keep his energy level down in the classroom but that afternoon his classmates told me they would trade treats like chocolate bars for Roderick’s popcorn chicken and whoever brought the best treats could get his popcorn chicken. There goes my plan of a nice sugarless treat.

notice the date
2 weeks before he
left for heaven

During the last months of his life he would text me from school saying, “Jazz is coming over can you make popcorn chicken?” and I couldn’t say no to that request so I would drop what I was doing, quickly thaw some chicken and make popcorn chicken for supper, so you can see why I will never again make popcorn chicken without remembering Roderick. 

It is interesting how it all started, or maybe it is not but I will tell you anyway, back when KFC came out with their popcorn chicken our kids loved it. As you can see mine looks more like popcorn then KFC’s does, just saying… When our layers are old and the flock is done producing eggs we get almost nothing for them because at that age the meat is not nearly tender enough for us Canadians so I would find ways to tenderize it and use it which would greatly reduce our grocery bill, meat being so expensive. Our hens have a lot of breast meat, one hen gives me 2.5 to 3 lbs of boneless chicken breast. Anyway, I figured out my own version of popcorn chicken and found I could make delicious popcorn chicken out of that chicken breast, but before you ask me for the recipe, I have none. I just know in my head what ingredients I throw together to make it.

The Ik should be
the last text

Here is my popcorn chicken story that I did not even know I had until yesterday when I made popcorn chicken and all these memories came flooding back to me. I even went on my phone and searched Roderick’s name on my text message app to check for those texts. His texts are still there four and a half years after he left, although some of them are not in the right order, as you can see in the screen shot it will sometimes place the response before the initial text.

If you are new to this blog and wonder what happened to our boys you can find it in the post titled Our Story, on the web version it is featured on the right side of the screen.

Roderick and Tyler

Roderick and Tyler were two quite different boys.  When I was pregnant with Tyler, I remember saying I was hoping for a boy.  I wanted a baby girl one day, but I had this vision of having two little boys playing together especially outdoors in the summer.  I often thought that although we had another baby boy that vision was not a reality. Roderick was so rough and tough and Tyler so sensitive and very easily hurt physically it was a battle.  I often felt like there was more conflict then happy playing although I know that is not true but so it felt.  I remember one time when there had been conflict again and Roderick had hurt Tyler I had enough and told Tyler “why don’t you do your own thing, you and Roderick don’t get along so why don’t you play something else, you don’t have to play with Roderick” and he said. “I don’t want to do my own thing, I want to play with Roderick, I just want you to make him stop hurting me”.  Our three kids usually played together, they rarely each did their own thing, Angeline definitely never played by herself, if the boys were not around she would sit on the rocker and rock until they came to play again, of course this changed a bit when they got older but if we were at home by ourselves you would usually find the three kids together.  So therefore, this caused a lot of conflict because they often had different ideas of what to do or what was fair sharing when they wanted to do the same thing that only one person could.  I remember a mom telling me one time that her children never did anything together they were always in opposite ends of the house.  So much so that if her and her husband ever caught them together discussing something or doing something together, they would nudge each other and watch. That must have been one peaceful house, but it did make me appreciate the fact that our children loved hanging out together even though that also brought a lot of conflict with it. After Roderick went to heaven Tyler mentioned one time that now looking back, he realized Roderick never had bad intentions when he hurt him or played so rough.

Tyler was a very content baby; he did not sleep so well during the night, but he played so content.  Roderick always demanded my time so I would put Tyler down with toys and he played contented for 30 minutes while I went to do stuff with Roderick. When Tyler was 9 months old I became pregnant and I remember worrying a bit about Tyler. Roderick was such a busy child and demanded so much of my time and now we would have another baby that would be very time consuming where would that leave Tyler.  I prayed about it and left it in God’s hands and like I said when Tyler became older he wanted to play with Roderick all time, although when Roderick wasn’t around or did something he did not enjoy he had no problem entertaining himself. He was never afraid to be alone and would not have minded staying at home by himself ever since he was old enough to know what it meant to be alone. He talked though, boy could he talk and ask questions and deep questions at an incredibly young age. I often felt like he was too smart for his age and that caused him some anxiety. One of the things he frequently talked about even when he was in grade 1 and 2 was that he did not feel like he could be a good daddy and wanted to know what would happen if he could not be a good daddy.  Interesting because I remember often thinking in his last years with us what an amazing husband and dad he would be some day and how I wished he could see that, he was our middle child, definitely not used to getting his way and always so sensitive to the feelings of others, my concern was that he would learn to take care of himself as well and that he would be able to see how amazing he was.

I remember one time, he was in grade one or two and we were going to town, I had allowed him to sit shot-gun and he wanted to know what if he became a bad guy when he grew up.  I was distracted and kind of tired of his constant blabber and answered, “you won’t become a bad guy”.  “what if I do?” he insisted.  “You won’t” I repeated but he wouldn’t let it go, “but what if I do?”  I finally looked at him and said “Tyler you don’t just become a bad guy, it’s a choice you make and as long as you try your best to do the right thing you won’t just become a bad guy.”  Again, he wanted to know “but what if I don’t do the right thing and become a bad guy?” I asked, “why would you not do the right thing?”  He said, “well I have to get married to a stranger and what if I’m too embarrassed to pray with her?”  I thought to myself, ‘all these questions because your stressing over the fact in grade 1 that you will be too embarrassed to pray with your wife’. I explained to him that by the time he got married she would no longer be a stranger, but he still felt like he might be embarrassed to pray with his wife. I’m not sure why because he was very open about what he believed but he got in trouble at school for not believing in Santa Claus so maybe some of those situations made him realize that being a Christian was not always the most popular thing and sometimes got him in trouble. Looking back now I wish I had put a little more emphasis on the fact that it would be fine if he didn’t pray with his wife, that we all have weaknesses and if that was his desire God would eventually guide him to be able to do that but it would not make him a bad guy if he didn’t.  

Roderick was not a very fussy baby but right from the start he was kind of busy, I remember telling my mom that Roderick never slept for more then an hour during the day, she could not believe it, that didn’t seem right for a baby but it was always like that. He slept during the night, started sleeping through the night at three months, but not long during the day, even though he wasn’t fussy there was never a break, every 10 minutes or so he needed something.  Interesting I never thought of this before but that is exactly what I said when he passed away, there is no such thing as a day off with Roderick, he was very busy with hockey and friends but if one night we were finally at home relaxing he would come and say “mom are you busy?” he respected if I had something to do but if I didn’t then he could finally get me to take him to the pet store to buy a fish or get those shoes that he needed, which was always true but I just wanted an evening off, I have plenty of evenings off now, don’t appreciate them as much as I thought I would though, well I do, kind of, but I’d be more then happy to take Roderick to what ever he needs.

Although Roderick was a remarkably busy kid there were a couple things we did not have to worry about, he would never wander off, he always made sure he knew where Jake or I were.  He seemed to have this fear of being left alone.  One day when Roderick was three Jake took him to the barn.  At that time, we did not live on the farm and the barn was on a big open property with no way of getting lost.  Roderick wanted to go outside and Jake said he could knowing that he wouldn’t wander off and be back to check if daddy was there quite frequently but this time he lasted quite some time until Jake became worried and went to check on him. He was no where to be seen; Jake called him, but there was no sign of him.  The only thing he could think of was that the cover to the septic was off because we had issues with it, he must have fallen in but there was no sign of that either.  Jake called me in a panic and said Roderick disappeared and he was going to get my brother who lived half a mile down the road to help him look for Roderick. Panic just struck me and I fell to my knees to pray, this could not be happening, Roderick had to be okay and in a few seconds the Lord clearly put this thought in my mind, ‘he is at Tina’s house’, my brother’s wife. I called her and she confirmed he had come in, she asked Roderick if his daddy knew he was there, he said yes. That is the only time Roderick has ever wandered off.

He also never walked into the basement by himself, I was a little concerned about his fear of going into the basement, his bedroom was in the basement, but he always needed someone to go with him.  When I asked him why, he said he was afraid there might be a monster in the basement.  This continued until through grade 5 but he was able to do it in such away that Tyler and Angeline never noticed. In grade five Tyler started noticing and commenting on why he would not go into the basement and asking if he was afraid. Roderick would not admit that, and it ended there.

Not too long before Roderick went to heaven, he was upset at his dad one time because Jake did not allow him to do something he wanted to do.  He went to hockey quite upset and when he came back, I asked if he was still mad at dad. He said, “no because I realize the only one that’s going to suffer by my anger is me.” We discussed it a bit and he did not mean that it wasn’t hurting us when he got angry but that it wouldn’t make any difference, dad wouldn’t change his mind because he was angry and if anything he would just get in more trouble.  I thought that was incredibly wise of him to realize that and control his anger so quickly.

How did you take this photo?

In the last months before Tyler went to heaven, I complimented him one time on his wisdom and knowledge and remarked how much potential he had, I could see him growing up to be successful. He burst out “your expectations of me are much to high, all I can do is have a mediocre life.” I was a bit taken aback by his outburst but walked over to him so I could face him and gently asked “what does mediocre mean to you? Would you call Dad and my life mediocre?” I told him he could do the same thing. Although he had a much better education then us and I could see a lot of potential in so many areas, this door is always open.  I told him he would have to work hard but eventually he would be where we are, and “we have no problem if you want to farm with us.” Shortly thereafter he came to me and said he had thought about it and he liked the kind of life dad has. He was his own boss and had a few employees working for him and could basically do what he wanted. He was considering doing that.  It seemed to give him new hope. Not long after that when I took him to an appointment he again talked about his dreams and how he was thinking about managing the farm so he had an income and didn’t have to worry about how to make a living and then on the side as a hobby do the things he loved.  He said he had never thought of himself as a writer but he realized if he could write about things he was interested in then he really enjoyed writing and he would like to write essays on video games, I think something like that, I so much wish I could remember what he called that kind of writing, he had a title for it. Those are precious memories to me when he opened and shared his dreams with me. 

Tyler was open about the fact that he did not like hugs and his cousins all knew that, so I didn’t hugged him much in the later years knowing that he did not really want hugs. Instead of hugging him good night I would just give him a pat on the shoulder or something but every once in a while he would give me a hug and that would make me feel so special because I knew he didn’t like hugs. They weren’t necessarily always in private either, it could also be when I picked him up from a friends sleepover party in front of his fiends. When I would comment on it, he would say, “I’m not like that, I’m not embarrassed to hug you in front of my friends.” 

Giving gifts was not Tyler’s thing either. Angeline loved giving gifts and would get something for Tyler on his birthday or for Christmas and Tyler would feel so bad that he had never gotten her anything, same with his cousins they would give him something on his birthday or even just send him a message and he would comment to me that he felt so bad that he had not remembered their birthday but he always remembered to get me something for mother’s day. It also made me feel so special because I knew that remembering to buy gifts was not easy for him. He did get Angeline something for her last birthday and Christmas as well.

OK, this wasn't so hard

I remember in grade five Roderick had some issues with one of his classmates. This boy was constantly doing stuff that was irritating and unkind and one day Roderick had enough and yanked him by his hoodie. He got sent to the office and I got a call from the school. When I talked to him, he was so upset that he got in trouble and this boy in Roderick’s opinion never got in trouble for all the stuff he did. I simply told him that I agreed and that a lot of the things this classmate did were unkind but I said “I don’t care if he has done a million things that are wrong but you did something here that was wrong and whether your classmate ever apologizes or not you still apologize for the mistake you made.” Roderick got it and was willing to apologize, I was so proud of him.

Roderick went through a period as well where he did not like me to hug him much, but he never said anything to others and let all his Aunties and cousins hug him when they came over.  One day when he had just given a bunch of extended family hugs as they were leaving, I said to him, “how come do your Aunties and cousins get hugs from you but I don’t?” He told me he did not want to offend them, ‘but you understand mom’. Somehow, he was able to say it in such a way that I felt incredibly honoured that he felt I understood him. In the last year or so before he went to heaven, when he asked for something whether it was a small favour or something bigger, he would often end his request with “I’ll give you a hug?” bargain. One time when he was facetiming a friend, he called me over and gave me a hug just to prove to his friend that he was not embarrassed to give his mom a hug.

If you are new to this blog and wonder what happened to our boys you can find it in the post titled Our Story, on the web version it is featured on the right side of the screen.

I am God's Favourite

I feel like I am God’s favourite.  Not because I am so perfect but more so because I’m so imperfect and even though I mess up over and over and am so injured He just keeps showering me with love and going out of His way to comfort me. 

I had a significant dream in October of 2017 where I felt God giving me a small taste of the love we will experience in heaven. (I wrote about this dream in the post of 10/17/2017 called Dreams) After Roderick went to heaven, I studied heaven and read a lot of near-death stories, like 90 Minutes in Heaven and Heaven is For Real.  One of the things that often came up was the incredible love and peace that we cannot imagine here on earth but is in heaven.  That love became important to me. This dream was the first one I had that has had a significant impact on me.  This was about 10 weeks before Tyler went to heaven and now looking back, I am wondering if that was God preparing me for what was to come. He knew that there was no way Tyler’s passing would make any sense in any way and He did not want to leave us hopeless.  He saw my faith and confidence in Him, he was changing Tyler before our eyes.  He saw how deeply and with confidence I believed that as Tyler was getting clarity over the doubts and questions he had, with all the things he had been through in loosing his brother plus overcoming such low self-esteem, beginning to see who he was in Christ together with his personality of always esteeming others better then himself and taking care of others at the expense of himself, I saw so much potential in him.. I had been fasting and praying for Tyler in the months before he went, and I knew God had great things in store for Tyler. God knew this would be an exceptionally hard blow on us.

In this dream a lot of things that I had read about heaven were clarified to me as well.  I knew that was my family in the dream, I had never seen them before but I knew, which is what you will hear about heaven, you know the people even if you have never seen them before, whether it’s the grandmother you have never seen or someone from the Bible. Also, I could feel and knew they loved me and knew me, and it seemed like I was their favourite person. That doesn’t happen in this life at least not in that way, when you see someone you don’t just know that they love you deeply and know you well although God does miracles here on earth many times as well where you just sense the love of God in someone. That is a small taste of heaven.  Another interesting thing about the dream was that I was in front of the house, I was nowhere else and even though I had never seen the place before I knew it was my home and I knew exactly how the lake and dock looked in the back in fact I would recognize it in a photo if I ever saw one. (If you have not you might like to read that post).  I am not pretending to have been in heaven in my dream, I believe heaven will be more beautiful then that. This was just a normal place like any place on this earth, it was the feeling of love and being known for who I was on the inside that was exceptional. 

I know that it was my taste of God’s love and the knowledge I had gained of heaven that made me think of the peace and love Tyler was experiencing as well as knowing he was free from pain in those first moments when I realized he was gone, in the midst of the shock and devastation.

Amidst our suffering God has blessed us with so many beautiful things.  The relationship Angeline Jake and I can have is amazing.  We are each other’s best friends.  Heaven is so real to us, and I never doubt God’s love, He has revealed himself to me so powerfully, so to others these dreams might still be just dreams and I’m ok with that but to me they are not. Even if they are just dreams, I have learned a lot from them.  All this makes me feel like I am God’s favourite, but I know you are too.

Each one of them is my favourite child

My Aunt came to visit last summer. I hadn’t seen her in years and not since the boys went to heaven so we talked about our experience and of course God in the midst of all that and she made this expression, “If God had favourites I believe I would be His favourite.” I do not know if she will be reading this, but the thought entered my mind “what’s so special about you.” I knew that all she meant was how loved she felt by God, but I thought that was a strange way to put it.

Back in elementary Angeline wanted to be the teacher’s favourite.  She had a friend who she perceived to be the teacher’s favourite and she would like to be the one the teacher loved the most.  We’d all like to be the person who is loved the most by those close to us but it seems kind of selfish because obviously others have to be loved less; only one can be the favourite.
One day not long after I visited with my aunt I lay in bed pondering and God gave me a clear revelation “that is exactly how he loves me.” He loves me like I am his very favourite person, like I am the only one he loves so much. That is exactly what he showed me in the two dreams I had where he embraced me, it was like I was his one and only favourite. I read about someone who had a near death experience who said that when Jesus looks at you it’s like he loves only you, all the love in him is for you alone, although you know he loves everyone with that same love it seems like you are his one and only special one and in that moment that morning I realized that is exactly how he loves me like I am truly his favourite.

I told Roderick one time, "you are my best son." It was the first time I had said that and even I felt a bit guilty saying that. I could tell Angeline she was my best daughter but I could not tell the boys your are my best son because there were two. Roderick looked up at me surprised and shocked, feeling both special and a bit disappointed that I would have favourites. Surprised, he asked me if I really liked him the best. I told him yes I do but I tell Tyler the same thing, he is the best too.  His countenance fell a bit realizing that was really not that special if he weren't better then his brother and that is how it is here on earth. In order for us to be the best someone else has to be less then us but not so in heaven. It's hard for us to grasp how we could all feel like favourites.

I read this story in The Fight to Flourish by Jennie Lusko:

Recently, Levi and I were having dinner at a restaurant with another couple.  Our waitress had a beautiful accent.  When we asked, she told us she was from Romania.  Levi spent a month on a mission trip there when he was fourteen, and he still remembered a few phrases in Romanian.  Without skipping a beat, he told the waitress, “Iisus te iubeste”—“Jesus loves you.” 

Not knowing a thing about her, Levi didn’t know how she would respond.  But her whole countenance lit up. Smiling wide, she nodded and immediately replied, “Oh yes, I’m His favorite.”

I had never heard that said before. I am God’s favorite. I was hit by this young women’s confidence in God’s love for her. She didn’t just think she was His favorite: she knew.  The interaction left a mark on me, and I left the restaurant that night feeling like God had spoken just to me. 

Last trip altogether 10 weeks before Roderick went to heaven.
Our boys waking up in their hotel room

You’re My favorite, sweetheart.

He speaks this to you, too, but it’s something you have to realize on your own.  People can tell you over and over how special you are, but it’s something you have to believe about yourself.

And so the Lord used my Aunts words to reveal to me how confident we can be in God’s love for us and he used this waitress’s words to reveal it to Jennie, I’m hoping you can see that too. For me at this time I no longer doubted God’s love it just gave me a new depth to the revelation.  Whatever stage you are in, I hope you can say with confidence I am God’s favourite.

If you are new to this blog and wonder what happened to our boys you can find it in the post titled Our Story, on the web version it is featured on the right side of the screen.

My Two Boys

My Two Boys

            We have two sons that are so different yet so similar.  Tyler is almost done with Driver’s Ed right now and coming into the stage where Roderick was when he went to heaven.  Even though the two brothers are very different I also see so many similarities in Tyler that remind me of Roderick at this age.  My two sons, I love them both dearly, not to leave out my daughter, I love her dearly too but I’m talking about my sons today.

            When Roderick was in grade 2 and Tyler was in Kindergarten the boys would usually take the bus home from school.  We only had a 10 minute drive to the small town of Riverton where they went to school but on the bus it took them about 45 minutes to get home so whenever I had errands to run I would call the school and tell them not to get on the bus but that I would pick them up.  The bus kids were always dismissed before the town kids.  One day I had called the school that I would pick the boys up but for some reason they had only told Tyler.  As the buses were about to leave the secretary remembered that she had forgotten to tell Roderick not to get on the bus, she runs to catch the bus and calls Roderick off just before they leave.  Out walks a teary eyed but very relieved Roderick.  He had been so scared not knowing what to do because he noticed Tyler wasn’t on the bus and didn’t know what happened to Tyler.  Although on a normal day Roderick thought it was his job to toughen up his brother he also had a very sensitive and protective spot in his heart for his brother.  He didn’t sit with his brother or pay attention to him on the bus but he definitely knew if he was there.  Reminds me of another story, which my friend told me about her kids on the bus.  She had three boys on the bus two who were in high school and one in grade two.  One day her two older boys walked into the house after school but not their younger brother.  My friend asks her boys where their younger brother is and they have no idea.  She asks if he was on the bus and they have no idea either.  She calls the school wondering where her son is and they were sure he had gone home on the bus, the school calls the bus driver only to find out her son had fallen asleep and missed getting off the bus, quite the opposite story.

            In 2010 we moved to the city from our farm in Riverton.  We were mostly moved but were back on the farm to do some work yet just before school.  We had supper at my brother’s house and I had gone back home to the house, which was just down the road from my brother’s.  Jake had gone to the barn, which was on my brother’s yard and my brother had gone to unload a load of square bales in the bale shelter, our three kids and his oldest son had gone with him to play on the bales.  My brother had unloaded part of the trailer and needed it backed up to unload the rest.  The youngest three kids were out of the way on the pile of bales in the shelter so he told Roderick to back up the trailer.  The trailer was hooked to a small pickup truck.  Because the truck was a standard it started to back with a jerk but just before Tyler had decided to jump onto the trailer, just as he landed the trailer jerked and he fell between the trailer and the truck on his tummy with his face down.  The truck tire drove right over him.  The tracks were clearly visible on his back.  The tire drove unto his back underneath his shoulder blade on one side then over the other shoulder blade rubbing against the side of his head and ear.  There was dirt pressed into his teeth and ear but when the tire was over Tyler got up on his own.  My brother came running to him to make sure he was fine.  He was having pain in his chest but could walk so my brother led him to the barn where Jake was.  He opened the door and called Jake.  Jake answered he was almost done and would be there shortly so my brother answered “your son has been run over by a truck”.  In that case there was no more work and Jake came running.  He then took the truck and drove Tyler to the house where I was.  He told me what happened but knew no details.  I gave Tyler extra strength Tylenol and took him to emergency.  Tyler would start to cry but then stopped short.  He did this several times.  He said it hurt so bad he needed to cry but then it hurt too much to cry.  The drive to emergency was about 35 minutes.  On the way Tyler asked me to pray for him that the pain would go away.  I prayed for him and by the time we got to the hospital I had to keep him from falling asleep.

            Meanwhile back home Jake went back to my brother's to see what had happened that’s when my brother told him that Roderick had been the one driving the truck and Jake looked up to see Roderick still sitting behind the wheel not knowing where to leave himself fearing what had happened to Tyler.  Thinking about it I still cry with pity for Roderick that he had to sit there as a ten year old for so long.  Jake went to comfort him saying that Tyler would be fine.  He then went back to the house with Roderick worrying about Tyler the whole time.  He tried to figure out what he could do for Tyler to make up for what he had done.  He wanted to use all the money he had in the bank to buy Tyler a bike.

            Back to the hospital, Tyler was taken in by the staff there and strapped to a board to protect his neck, while I was taken into the office to answer questions.  There were two young guys working on Tyler and I could hear them questioning him.  I was a bit worried what they would do if they found out that a 10-year-old had been at the wheel and run over Tyler, I thought we might get in trouble but they never asked me.  I heard the young guys asking Tyler who had driven the truck, he told them his brother had, they asked how old he was and Tyler said “ten”.  But they never mentioned it again.  Tyler was taken in for x-rays and then brought back into the room to wait for the results.  The Doctor took a cloth and cleaned his face and teeth while chatting with Tyler.  When the x-rays were done he left Tyler and me alone for a bit to go look at them.  As soon as Tyler and I were alone Tyler started to cry not for pain but for Roderick.  He so much hoped that Roderick would not feel to bad because it wasn’t his fault.

            The x-rays were sent to the city to specialists for closer observation.  At the hospital Tyler was completely relaxed, I couldn’t tell that he was in pain anymore although if I asked his chest was still hurting.  When the Doctor came back in he said there was no damage and nothing broken.  He unstrapped Tyler from the board and told him he could tell his friends he was iron man, he could get run over by a truck and nothing happened to him.  Tyler said “that’s not the reason”.  “What’s the reason then? Asked the Doctor.  “Are you a Christian?” Tyler asked.  The Doctor said he was.  And Tyler said that was the reason, God had protected him.

            When Tyler got home he told Roderick first thing not to feel bad, Roderick was so happy to see him, for a couple days there they were best friends (I mean they were always best friends but brother best friends who play and fight together) but for a couple days there was no fighting and they wanted to play together all the time.   

            These are my two awesome boys; I can imagine the happy reunion they will have in heaven.

Thanks for Your Support

First of all, I want to thank you all for coming out and supporting the second annual Roderick Rempel Floor Hockey Tournament.  I want to thank the committee for spending so much time planning and organizing and I want to thank MBCI and all the staff for hosting and supporting this event. Thanks to Mr Downie for coming back and MCing for us and to all the volunteers and teams that are involved, and who make this day so special. Thank you to everyone, this tournament means so much to my family and me.

I was asked if I ever felt that Roderick was watching over all of this.  I said of course, but I often believe he would be thinking, “all this because of me?” This reminds me of the time when Roderick posted on his Facebook page, “I may be unknown now, but eventually I will be unforgettable.” I know that he would be very humbled and thankful for this event and for the fact that this tournament raises funds to provide scholarships and bursaries to students who are not able to afford Christian education. I would like to thank you all for helping keep Roderick’s memory alive.

There is a verse in the Bible that has really become meaningful to me. In Hebrews 11, it talks about the great people of faith that have gone on before us and then it says, ‘Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, referring to the people who have gone before us. I believe Roderick is now one of that crowd of witnesses cheering us on in our race.  I made post cards for Roderick’s birthday with that verse on the front. I have extra copies if anyone would like one. They are by the table with the memorabilia and you are welcome to take one. 

I did not make a lot of resolutions for 2017; however I did make one.  I decided that in 2017, I would see something beautiful come out of this tragedy.  I saw this beautiful back yard, in it was a tree that looked like the trunk had split in half and half of it had fallen over.  Half of it was still growing the other half had become this beautiful table for flowers and greenery.  It was beautiful, I wish I had a picture of it but it reminds me of this storm of tragedy that has ripped through our family.  It’s not the norm to turn a fallen tree into something beautiful. Usually, it is cut up for firewood. All you see is a broken tree that looks so damaged, but it is possible to make something beautiful from it, and that is what I’m believing for. 

To all of Roderick’s friends, I know this tragedy has affected you as well. I encourage you to continue to strengthen your faith in the Lord and to know that you are loved. I also encourage families to love one another and to remember that life can be short, and to cherish each day you spend with each other.

Roderick’s mom

Rod's 2017 tournament

I read a quote sometime ago that said, “The time to make friends is before you need them!!”

Never before have we realized how important friends are, and how much kids can add to the parent’s circle of friends. So many of you here today we know because of Roderick.

Having this tournament is a huge honour for us as parents, and how much more for Roderick, how proud he'd be or is to see that his life here continues to have an impact on so many people. I’m often reminded of a discussion we had not long before his passing on really valuable art, so often the artist is not around anymore to enjoy the success, the comment Roderick made, he was quiet for a bit and then said "that sucks".  That is how we feel now too, it really sucks having these tournaments on one hand, but on the other hand it's a huge blessing and honour and may his short life here on earth continue to remind us of what kind of legacy we would like to leave.

Thank you so much for coming out so let's go play hard and have fun and just so you know the "Wolverines Old Boys Organization” are here today to take home the championship title.

Roderick’s dad