Dream Again

Dream Again

Just recently we had someone come by to do some work on our house.  He’d done work for us before so we knew the guy.  We asked how things were going and he said it had been slow July and August but now it was just busy, busy.  We were happy for him knowing he was trying to get a business going but he said, “Yea but it’s hard, with two little kids and being so busy”.  It’s true, I get it, getting somewhere financially is hard work and you’ve got to priorities your time.  Kids are much to precious not to have time for them and all your finances won’t make up for it.  Having said that though it takes money to raise kids and give them opportunities.  It’s hard but it’s great.  Working hard is great and having kids is even greater.  So lets focus on the greater rather then the hard.

After the one year Anniversary of Roderick going to heaven I stopped blogging, I hadn’t intended to I just felt like I didn’t need it anymore.  We had overcome all the firsts after his leaving and we seemed to have slipped into this blankness, is that even a word? Or nothingness.  Time seemed to drag for me.  I feel the second year has been much longer then the first.  The summer seemed meaningless except for a couple camping trips, those were great and we enjoyed them but planning them was hard.  No one seemed to know what to do and no one wanted to come up with ideas when we talked about it, it seemed no one really cared.  We talked about going on a trip but no one seemed to care much. 

One day Tyler comes to Jake and me and out of the blue says, “we should get a pool”.  He added that he wanted to start having friends over more often and it would be nice to have a pool.  That same day Angeline comes and says the same thing without knowing that Tyler had brought it up.  Not to long after that Tyler said we should get a tree house built, that should be our project for the summer, so as a family we started dreaming about it.  We discussed whether it would be wise to build a pool unto this yard because it doesn’t raise the value of the property.  We bought an old house six years ago and renovated it but it hadn’t ever really been our intention to make this a long-term home, this was just what we could afford at that time.  So we started looking for a house and enjoyed dreaming as a family again.  We bought a house in September. This will stretch us financially and even though we are big on financial freedom I think it will be good for us to work hard to get ahead financially.  We needed a kick in the butt to say get up, work hard, make it work, start dreaming again, and have a reason to plan.   So if you find it difficult to work hard and get ahead while taking time for your kids. Enjoy it; it really is a blessing even though it is hard. 

We still struggle with dreaming and planning many times but we are excited about moving in February and it is great to dream again. 

I did struggle with the fact that Roderick was not a part of this.  There would be no room in the house that used to be Roderick’s; nothing about the house would remind us of Roderick although we will still have lots of memorabilia to put up for him.  But I had no doubt in my mind that Roderick would have been so excited for this and he would be so mad if his leaving would stop us from moving on in life and dreaming again.  I know we honour him more by moving on and just knowing he is with us all the time wherever we go then being stuck because of his leaving.  After all he has his palace that is by far better then the house we purchased.