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Monday, November 18, 2019

Tribute by Cousins



Where do I even start, you were one of the most interesting, knowledgeable and fun-loving people in my life. I always admired how you never let a question stay a question.  If you were wondering about something, you’d simply look it up and two seconds later you would know the answer.  I would always learn something new when I was around you.  I always loved the fact that you were the only one so far to have given me a creative nickname.  You called me My Manda, so I was your Manda and you were my Ty.  I have so many stories that bring a smile to my face but a lot of them were just “you had to be there kind of moments”.  I’ll never forget the countless hours of easy video games we played because those were the only ones that I could play or you leading me through a virtual reality horror game telling me everything was fine right before I’d scream my face off because of a jump scare you didn’t mention was coming, you’d laugh at my reaction.  I watched my first anime with you and I always loved coming over to watch any anime series that we were currently on.  Making you laugh would always be a huge accomplishment for me because you always made me laugh and you friendly sound effects always lit up my day.  I remember you playing a video game and both of us just humming along to the music playing in the background over and over again.  Its going to be hard coming over and you not being there, say Hi and light up my day.  I’m so thankful for the time that we got to share together.  We’re gonna miss you so much but I’m looking forward to seeing you in heaven Tyler. 
                                                                                                            --Cousin Miranda
Tyler’s passing was and still is, a hard one to swallow. My mind has been racing since I heard; at our family gatherings we had in spite of this tragedy, I had a hard time having fun and not thinking about how I wouldn’t get to sit down with him and discuss issues that were of importance to no one but us.
We loved to delve into the deepest, most touchy subjects of theology and philosophy and politics. We’d discuss our philosophies on “the separation of church and state” or “socialism vs capitalism,” anything that plagued our minds. Although him and I often had very, very different views of the world, he had a listening ear that was not to be surpassed, and I regret to say that I can’t say the same for myself. I cannot recall who said this, but someone said, “It is the mark of a wise man to be able to entertain a thought, without accepting it,” and Tyler can be called a very wise man. Me being the slow talker that I am, I will always appreciate and miss the way he - although he did not agree with my view - listened to what I had to say till the end without a single interruption. I hate to say it but often I was guilty of reading material or researching just to stick it to his “wrong” viewpoint at the next gathering or the next time we met, but he wasn’t. He had a very busy mind, and lots of his questions and viewpoints were misunderstood by me and many others I’m sure, as an act of defiance or rebellion, when they were simply just part of his quest for understanding. Although I spent a lot of time trying to prove him wrong, it was never out of hate or spite, but it was misdirected love for him, I wanted to show him the “right” way to live. And for that I am deeply sorry. I will miss having someone who I can burden with my latest philosophical discovery, someone who listens genuinely from a heart of learning.
I could see a love in his eyes for everyone, especially for Angie. When he talked to Angie I could see the deepest care in his countenance, the care of a mother bear to its cub. I could see it in his eyes that if ANYONE would ever try to hurt her, he would be there to mess them up. It didn’t always seem like it because he would avoid human contact, but I always saw through that. When I would see him, he and I would smile, and he knew what was coming. He knew he’d have to fight away from a hug, and I’d have to chase him…but he wouldn’t fight very hard. He’d pretend to hate it but I knew that he loved to love and be loved.
Regardless of why this tragedy took place, I know that God aches and pains with us for the loss of what would’ve been one of his smartest, most cunning and strategical ambassadors to this earth. Tyler struggled with theology, and that shouldn’t be misunderstood as an atheistic viewpoint, it should be understood as a journey he needed to take to fully understand his faith. That is more effort put into his faith than many of us can say we’ve put in. I can say with full confidence that he would’ve come through that struggle with an understanding of God and faith like no other, I can also say that he would’ve lived without any man made religion, controlling rules, or tradition, because as many of us know, he was quick to point out the fallacies of these and they frustrated him. One more thing I can point out with full confidence and peace, is that, though he wrestled with his beliefs, our loving Father is currently showing him around his new living space, answering all the questions and frustrations that not many people here on earth would’ve taken seriously, with an understanding heart and a kind cadence, smiling with care at Tyler.
                                                                                    --Cousin Darwin

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